YOUR IKIGAI

We all want a sense of purpose in our lives – something that makes us happy and makes our lives feel full; something that spurs us on to get out of bed in the morning. The Japanese have a word for this feeling of purpose: ikigai, which translates roughly as “a reason for living”. It’s a core belief or feeling that characterizes who you are and what’s most important to you, and many believe that finding and defining your ikigai – the thing that makes you tick – is the key to feeling fulfilled and happy.

Your ikigai is a current that runs through your whole life. However, although it sounds grand, the actions you take to pursue it often play out on the small-scale – your ikigai will inform the simple transactions of day-to-day life. For instance, if your ikigai was to help other people, holding the door open for someone could be a small everyday way of pursuing what makes you feel happiest.

Your ikigai will be unique to you, because we all find happiness in different ways. You may find it through your work or through a hobby. Your ikigai could be providing and caring for your family, or you could find it through creating beauty, by making laughter, or by spreading peace. You may even find that your ikigai changes as you go through life, because what brings you joy at 25 may be different to what fulfils you at 65.

Finding your ikigai is not something that happens overnight. Being able to boil your life’s purpose down to one sentence requires self-reflection and insight, and it means being completely in tune with yourself. Even if you have an approximate sense of what your ikigai might be, it can take years before you reach a conclusion.

You probably have a good idea of what you like and don’t like doing, but your ikigai runs deeper than having a passion for something. For instance, you may be a keen gardener, but ask yourself why you love gardening. Why does it bring you joy and satisfaction? Is it because you like seeing the continual progress of the plants that you tend to? Is it because you want to cultivate beautiful things? Is it because you like to create order and structure? Once you have answered this question, think about it in terms of your life as a whole. Do you enjoy finding beauty, structure or progress in other areas of your life too? Once you start looking, it is likely that you will begin to see patterns in your answers. This is the start of finding your ikigai.

WHAT IT IS AND WHAT IT ISN’T

Primarily, your ikigai should be something that brings you joy and leaves you feeling fulfilled rather than drained. Even if your ikigai is related to making others happy, it should also make you happy; it won’t be something you do out of a sense of obligation.

Your ikigai will usually help you to connect to the people around you, as it’s often about what you can give to the world rather than what you can take. For instance, a writer’s work will be read and discussed, an artist’s work will be viewed, and a volunteer’s time will help another person. An ikigai will also be active – not passive. It’s something that you deliberately pursue for the specific purpose of bringing you joy, even if it’s as simple as going for a walk, reading a book or talking to a friend.

Your ikigai is often related to things you can see growing and developing, whether you’re working on a project, improving a skill or watching a child growing up. This is also why an ikigai will not be a specific goal. Your ikigai is a defining part of you that will always exist, so there is no finish line. However, it doesn’t mean that your ikigai can’t help you to achieve your dreams. For instance, your ikigai would not be to publish a novel, but it could be sharing stories and connecting with others. In that case, publishing a novel might be something you do in the course of pursuing your purpose.

THE GIFTS OF IKIGAI

So why bother identifying your ikigai? It takes so much time and effort – why not just carry on through life doing the things you like to do and avoiding the things you don’t? Because having a concrete grasp on what makes you you – a definite sentence that defines who you are and what your purpose is – is empowering.

Knowing your ikigai means that you have a deep understanding of yourself and what makes you feel your best. It means you know how to find happiness. It also gives you a sense of control; it helps you to direct your life and it enables you to pinpoint what motivates you.

Your ikigai is also an anchor, and it can help to guide you in times of difficulty, because you know with certainty what matters to you and what your priorities are.

Studies show that understanding your ikigai can help you to live longer too – this is most likely because it helps to keep your mind and body active, it maintains your positivity and drive for life, and it helps to keep you connected to those around you.

HOW TO FIND YOUR IKIGAI

Finding your ikigai can take many years, and people often find that it reveals itself over time, rather than being found. However, there are ways you can help to kickstart this process of self-discovery.

Start by asking questions: what moments do you most enjoy in everyday life? What do you do without anyone asking you to do? What were your favourite things to do as a child? What makes you feel emotions strongly? What are you looking forward to? If money was no object, what would you still want to do? The answers to these kinds of questions will give you a feel for what makes you tick; the next step is to look at your answers and see if you can find patterns.

The key is to pay attention to yourself and the way you feel. Notice when you are curious about something and allow yourself to follow it. Interrogate your hobbies – why do you love doing what you do? Although your ikigai is more than a passion, our hobbies tell us a lot about what we feel deeply within ourselves.

Don’t feel you have to search too far beyond yourself and the life you already live. You will probably naturally have a sense of what your ikigai might be, as you will already know what inspires you and draws your attention. It just takes time to be able to crystallize those feelings into a single sentence. And, while you’re taking that time, remember that, even if you don’t have your ikigai defined completely, every day spent paying attention to what inspires you and brings you joy will help you to live a richer, more fulfilling life.

Extracted from The Art of Japanese Living by Jo Peters is published by Summersdale, £14.99